Good Morning Everyone,
It's about 2 AM and I just had to write. I was laying awake, thinking of surfing and what it means to me, and I just had to express myself.
Surfing has saved my life. It has given me a new hope. A dream. A vision. And a truly beautiful way to express myself physically, mentally, and spiritually. And, it has allowed me to meet some of the most beautiful and kindest and most gentle people on the planet. Oh how it is helping me to make such beautiful friends. And in such friendships, I am finding surfing fun and beauty and art and joy and oh such magical wonder and happiness.
Oh yes, so it is still the Christmas Season and I had such a truly beautiful magical Christmas as I've mentioned. I'll put up some photos as soon as I get them on the computer. Hopefully, some of you'll find them fun. As I said, I had a North Pole Surfing Adventure Christmas and it was so awesome. And the food, oh wow, we made so many wonderful things. The party we had for our friends (I so wish you all could have been here, that would have been so fun), was so nice.
Sitting here this dark night, I feel so filled with smiles as I think of my new longboard and my new fins. I truly feel like the most blessed girl on the planet. I am finding that my explorations into surfing are giving me such a wonderful view and expression of life and living fully in-the-moment, embracing all that is physical, deep within my body, in any form of movement, or, stillness. Surfing gives me such beautiful joy, such, expression, such sensations just dance beyond expression. There is just so much to explore and feel and be and I just love the softness and beauty and femininity of the art. The longboard is just such a truly beautiful way for a girl to open herself to the world around her and to embrace life fully in an expression of pure passion. I'm sure it's this way for all of you out there too. I know it is this way for the surfing friends I have met, I mean, they all so love our sport and art and they each so very much inspire people like me in such beautiful ways to learn to move like they all do. It is all I dream of. All I hope for. For in expressing beauty in surfing, I see it as a way to bring beauty to life, for all to experience. Surfing creates such a genuine pure innocent smile of joy that it just beams from ones body and all who you then meet can feel this beautiful energy and it makes them happy. So, while surfing on the surface is about ones own physical love of feeling, it truly shines forth to make the world a better place for it makes each of us a better more beautiful person and that spreads to all who we meet. At least, that's how, in my innocence, I see it. And, well, it's how I want to see it too. I want with all of my heart for surfing to be in all of my movements, no matter what I'm doing. I long for the grace and the way surfing effects the muscles and creates such beautiful graceful athletic bodies. You can tell a surfer when you see them, for their body looks like a surfer's body. And I find that truly beautiful.
I hope and pray that I can find a shaper who is interested in givng a girl with a dream a chance. Golly I'd love to work for the best of the best in shaping boards, wouldn't that be just the greatest thing!!! I'd so love to learn to shape. My dream is that somehow, some way, I can learn that art, hopefully and in my dreams, from a legend of the art. Wow, would could be a more beautiful dream than that!!! Just to even take a class from such a person, whoever he may be, makes my heart pound with excitement. I have such beautiful visions for boards and shaping and rails and tails and, oh golly, it's all just so very exciting and magical to me. I learned to work with syrofoam long ago from my Daddy, he was a taxidermist and mounted animals for large businesses and museums and things like that. We did it the old-fashioned way, by starting with a large block of styrofoam and carving the magical visions of the animals to put the skins over. That probably sounds yucky to you, but it was a way to preserve some animals so that lots of people can see what they look like and learn about them at museums. Such three-dimensional shaping ideas of muscles and body shapes just dance in my head and I so long with all of my heart to take such mental visions and to learn to apply them to surfboards for expression with waves for what could be more beautiful than that? You know, a truly organic, almost "living," line of surfboards, ones that just feel and become true extensions and links between the body and the water in an almost orgasmic way. Oh how such thoughts excite me. It's got to just be that way for all who shape, I'm so sure. Learning to carve boards, in the old-fashioned way, each one by hand, filling the board with love and one's own spirit sounds so beautiful, like true works of art, like, the beautiful two longboards that I now have been so graced to own. I look at them, feel them, touch them, and find such beauty in their lines, such harmony in their shapes. oh how the art calls to my soul to learn to express myself in shaping like that too. Their magic draws me to them for they are such beautiful expressions of art and skill and functionality and personal expression.
Being the Christmas season, one tends to sample a few cookies and other yummies, naturally, but now, that is over and it is time for me once again to have my beloved fish tacos and fruit. With eating, I try to be careful and I so want to shape and create the perfect surfer's body. I just love the feel it allows one to experience literally in all that one does. And that feeling of muscles and shape express themselves in any and everything we do. Oh how I love movement so in all of it's forms. It just draws me uncontrollably as a form or personal expression.
Sitting here, this evening, brings my thoughts to this last Summer. How how that was so scary. I really never thought I'd see the Fall, let alone the beautiful magical Christmas that Santa and some of my surfer friends just helped me have. It was the most beautiful Christmas I've ever had in my life and, golly, it's making me cry with happy tears at the moment. Sorry you all out there in blog land about that. I feel deeply, as some of you may have guessed. That's just the kind of girl I am.
As some of you know, I'm facing, once again, some health challenges. Some rather scary things are surfacing. And the more they do, the more I am drawn to surfing as a form of expressing myself. For I so love our art so. Well, in the midst of all of this, I am thinking of a new board. A very special board. But one I can not talk of at this time for it is so very special. But before the next New Year is up, you shall all see her in her beauty for she shall be the most beautiful board every created. She is to be aboard created to surf monsters. Up to 100 footers. I know nobody has done a 100 footer, but I believe in dreaming for the stars. And I also know that nobody could ever have such a dream and follow it in a year like I am trying to do with my blog here but you all are seeing my adventure live, daily, before you eyes as I transform my body, spirit, and mind into the surfer I need to be to dance with my dream. My board will, in some ways, something like what Laird Hamilton rides for he rides giants, and I want so to ride like he does, only, I have to do it without the foot straps because of my torn acl and torn meniscus. My surgeon told me that I can never again be strapped down like that by my feet. So, I shall learn to ride monsters with bare feet, the old fashioned way, and, I shall train myself with an intensity unseen by most surfers until I can do just that.
For my dream, I need a master shaper, a man of legend, an artist, for I will be trusting him with my very life.
I seek to ride such a monster wave for pure art. For the feeling of it. Of course, my daily surfing will be in normal waves for such surfing is what sings to my soul, but I just have to seek to ride the beasts of the sea too, the true wave legends never before faced. You see, for when I lay there hooked up to all kinds of odd and scary electrical things in the hospital last Summer, my vision was so clear to me what I needed to do with my life. I had to live. To live fully and in-the-moment in all ways, in order to bring that very energy of life to others so that they can too feel such energy.
My board must be not merely functional, but one of great beauty. And, I just know that it will be.
The board must be magical and filled with wonder. It must ride like liquid mercury upon the water, that is why it is to be silver, for the dream or vision was of riding mercury, a mercury gun on a huge wave.
When I was in the ocean, surfing Hurricane Andrew, that day, that moment did something to me, It filled my soul with such a yearning, such a feeling of awe and humility before the sea, and I so liked that with all of my soul. To be so humbled, so powerless before the storm, and thus, to be so receptive to it's power, made me so longing for the storm to be within me, to be a part of me, oh my friends, I can feel the force of Hurricane Andrew (that was in '92 in Southern Florida) to this day, even in this very moment as I type these words to you all. I feel as though that storm is in me, part of me, somehow, oh I don't know how to express this but I'm sure you all who are surfers know what I mean exactly. I can this very instant feel each and every second on those waves that day, smell the air and sea, feel the wild raging winds tear into my body, the churly churly water ripping at me with sand and sea and storm making me like a sister to the sea.
I have to. I have no choice but to follow my soul and my vision for it is what fills me with hope, like it did this last painful terrifiying Summer.
I am sitting here just with the largest beaming smile at the moment. I can't help melf, surfing does this to me. My very hopes are with my beautiful red and white striped Wingnut longboard and my new board once it is made. They are my dreams, my lifeline, my magic. And through them, I have met a truly beautiful friends.
My friends, one very special friend in particular, hase such a gift for making people happy and filling them with dreams and hope and magic and health. Oh poo, now I'm crying again. Sorry about that, you all. I just feel so blessed to have met such a wonderful friends like I have met lately. I feel as though I have been blessed with the gift of a lifetimes dreams. My whole life I have wanted to surf like I am doing now, to be where I am right now. Even with some rather scary things going on. It's all worth it. For right now, today, I am truly living and it is all because of surfing. And meeting such kind people like you both. I still remember my very first surfboard I made. I was in 5th grade. I used the skills my Daddy had taught me with taxidermy to shape that board and I filled it with such love. As the years progressed and I got into high school, I actually skipped 46 days of high school (hmm, I hope my old high school isn't reading this, goodness) to go surfing. The wind would call and my spirit danced, not at all unlike the surfer girl in the movie Summer School (if you all have not seen it, please oh please do, it's a fun film with Mark Harmon and that girl in the film so was like me in those days). The waves would call and I had to go to them. And it is like that now. I feel the sea calling me. And I must go to her. You surfers out there know of this feeling, for it is in you all too.
Sorry if this was rather long blog entry this time everybod. I so hope that at least some of you have enjoyed reading it.
Bodaciously Stoked,
Lily of the Valley
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